How To Make Sure Your Teenage Granddaughters Never Want to Spend a Weekend With You Again!

It all started when we found out that Jordan and Morgan's family vacation on the Jackson side was cancelled. They had already spent Friday with me---a little shopping for dresses in the morning (both girls are invited to a family wedding with their boyfriends---twins---Cameron (J's) and Carson (M's)---isn't that cute---dating identical twins? Then we met my friends, Connie and Karolyn for lunch and a movie ("Grown-Ups"---very funny, but you have to like really goofy movies). Butch would have picked them up after the shopping, but they wanted to go to lunch and the movie. They like my friends which I think is pretty high praise. The girls were going to be leaving pretty much as soon as I dropped them off after the movie. We were standing in line to buy the movie tickets when they got the call. Morgan was happy as she wasn't thrilled to be going, but Jordan was disappointed.

Later Friday night, Morgan called to ask if I would take her and her friend to a party on Saturday night. I asked if her mom had told her "no". That's when I found out the girls were going to spend Saturday night with us. Steph was going to be out-of-town leaving Saturday morning and hadn't called us yet to see if that would work for us. I'm always the last to know what's going on.

I went over to pick the girls up at 3:30 p.m. Morgan's friend, Addison was with her (she's spending the night with us too). Morgan asked if I'd pick up another friend on the way. Not a problem---except when I got to Savannah's house, there were 3 boys there that also piled in. Morgan whispered that she didn't know the boys needed a ride. Right away, I start thinking of all the back ways I could go to avoid seeing any policemen since I had 8 people in a car that only seats 5. I was a nervous wreck---I'm a major rule follower. I dropped Jordan by the house first and then delivered all of the kids to the party. I'll be picking them up at 10---Morgan's curfew.

I felt pretty bad for Jordan, because---what a bummer to have to spend a Saturday night with your grandparents. Her boyfriend is out-of-town. She wasn't complaining or anything, but to make it seem like a little more fun, I made her favorite supper---grilled cheese with tomatoes. She requested a dessert, so I made some fancy brownies. She wanted to watch a family movie, but Butch convinced her to watch a rock and roll dvd a friend lent him. You can imagine how much she's enjoying that---along with Butch's "blow by blow" commentary---Chuck Berry, Leslie Gore, The Beach Boys, James Brown---he keeps saying things like---"these are the guys that invented rock and roll, Smokey Robinson started the Motown sound, James Brown is the godfather of soul," etc. Which then lead to the critique of the clothes, dancing and hair. When the Beach Boys sang Little Surfer Girl, I had to tell her the story about my first "necking" party. Ronnie had taken me to this party where he set me up with a guy. I was so upset when we got home---mom hit Ronnie and yelled at him for taking his sister to a party like that. Oh, the memories....

I then told Jordan that that same boy ended up being my boyfriend about 6 months later. He's the one that took me to his homecoming dance but failed to tell me that it was semi-formal. I showed up in a plaid skirt and sweater. Talk about embarrassing. She remembered me telling her that story, but laughed at it again anyway.

Anyway, just about the time I'm thinking she'll do anything rather than have to spend another weekend with the "grands", she says, "see, we don't have anything classic like this---just all black music." I couldn't believe it. I asked her if she was really, really enjoying this show. She said that she really was. Unbelievable!!!

I'm telling you, Jordan and Butch have the sweetest relationship. I just love to see them together. They are sitting on the couch playing online poker together as they watch the show. Over the past few weeks, they've been fishing and tubing. Plus they share a love of the classic car auction show. He's promised to take her to one sometime.

I'm starting to think that just maybe spending the weekend with us isn't a fate worse than death after all. I guess I'm thinking of how I would have felt if I'd had to spend a teenage weekend with either one of my grandparents. We think we're cool. Maybe the kids think so too. At least that's what I want to believe.

The Beach Club Resort

This is the Disney Resort that we stayed at this time. I was beautiful and had the hugest sand bottom pool I've ever seen. It had a sunken ship that contained a water slide.

Sandy is responsible for getting the matching t-shirts---she did it last time too. This one is the classic Mickey and each has our name on it. The teenagers weren't thrilled to be so obviously part of a family---especially since so many people ask where we got the shirts. I'm only sad that we didn't get a picture of the whole family with them this time.

Here's How it Went!

You'll have to figure out the pictures.

Our trip was great as usual. Disney is a place that the whole family loves. It was hot---my tip that I read about keeping sweat from dripping into my eyes and burning (put a coat of chapstick on your eyebrows)---didn't work. And did I mention it was hot? I've decided that if you're having fun and it's hot, it doesn't bother you as much. But if you are not having fun and it's hot, all you can think about is how hot it is. Still not as hot as that Mexico vacation a few years ago. Luckily for us, we were having fun the whole time, so the heat didn't stop us---nor did the showers or lines. We're used to handling it all.

We have Disney down to an exact science---arrive at the opening of the early park for the day---Butch or Greg collects the entrance passes and runs for fast passes---ride all major rides within the first hour---and never mind about food. Re-ride major rides with fast passes. Barb sits around with Elizabeth and waits while they ride the big rides. Elizabeth even rode some of the big ones this time---wherever she met the height limit. Sandy got on some of the bigger rides too. I rode a couple, but I have a queasy stomach on anything that spins too much.

I admittedly have a problem with obsessive counting. With 11 people, I'm constantly counting everyone. When the 3 teenagers went off by themselves, it really helped by reducing my counting to 8. It's annoying to be me sometimes.

11 people going to the bathroom is just plain ridiculous. For some reason, everyone doesn't go at the same time. Just about the time we're ready to move on, someone else decides to "go." A potty stop takes at least a half hour.

I had hoped to have some down time at the hotel, so brought my stitching. My Gingher scissors (interpret that expensive) were used for everything but stitching---cutting off tags, cutting out temporary tattoos, welting (that Mitchell inadvertently pulled out of the sofa) and hair. It will be a miracle if they aren't ruined.

Speaking of Mitchell, he drew the short straw and had to stay in our room. That wasn't all bad considering he was the only one in the family to have a bed entirely to himself. I think I really got him though when he first came in. I said, "Okay Mitchell, you and I are sharing a bed. Which one do you want?" I ended up laughing and blowing the whole thing, but the look on his face was pretty good. One night, little did I know that he made a phone call to his parents from the bathroom at 2 a.m. because his stomach was hurting. He left and we never even heard the door! In the morning, when he wasn't in his bed, it did freak me out for a bit. I guess it's pretty easy to lose a kid in a hotel room after all.

Mitchell left his clothes in his parents room across the hall. He just let his dirty clothes pile up in our room between his bed and the wall and behind the bathroom door----his big 'ol clompin' shoes were behind the door too. By the end of the week, we almost couldn't get the door open. One night when the teens got home about 11:30 p.m., I thought he was going to get his pajamas. When I asked him about it, he said that he was wearing them. That turned out to be a pattern---whatever he wore all day, he slept in at night---that might be a slight exaggeration as I didn't really keep track of what he was wearing to bed each night. I guess I'm glad I didn't share a bed with him after all! Those previous pictures of the messy room were Steph, Mindy, Jordan and Morgan's.

Butch still takes care of all "his" girls. He goes downstairs and gets tea for me every morning. He is also everyone's alarm clock. Luckily we had adjoining rooms which made it easier. Everyone gives him "jobs" to do. Morgan needed the padded inserts to her bathing suit top put back in---that was cute to see him trying to figure out which way they were supposed to go. He charges cell phones, puts new batteries in things, cuts off tags, collects receipts. He attempted to put a temporary tattoo on Elizabeth's cheek, but put it on wrong---he'd never done that before. He's constantly checking up on everyone---do you have your phones, room keys, etc. Besides all that, basically, he's the pack horse. Today he didn't think he needed to carry the back pack, but the girls all insisted that "we" needed it. Stephanie and Mindy each added an extra pair of shoes. He asked them why they wouldn't wear the most comfortable ones to begin with---to which Mindy responded----"DAD! I'm tired of being a fashion victim!" Reminds me of a weekend trip to St. Louis in the 80's where among the 4 of us girls, we had 26 pairs of shoes. He didn't get it then either! We're just glad he didn't try to bring the fanny pack this time. Yes, he still has one or two.

Besides the shoes, the back pack contained several pairs of sunglasses, lip glosses, 2 cameras,

3 phones, Mindy's Disney insulated cup, Steph's Sprite, 3 packs of crackers/cereal bars, 1 tampon, 2 credit cards and 6 rain ponchos---not a single thing was HIS. He should go on Let's Make a Deal---as he has everything anyone asks for---safety pins, sunblock, band aids (he always travels with a first aid kit), shampoo, cell phone charger, toothpaste---he wonders how anyone travels without him! Sometimes, so do we!

I do my part too---seems someone always needs a pair of my socks or a t shirt, hair brush, hairspray, etc. I do everyone's hair at some point---Mindy included, Mitchell excluded. Vacation is synonymous with French braids. Seems like someone always needs to "borrow" my toothpaste, face cleanser, or whatever. On the way home one night, Jordan asked if she could borrow my shampoo and creme rinse. I said yes, but everyone knows that I take a shower before bed whenever I travel. I no sooner get in the shower than I realize that she snatched it BEFORE I had a chance use it. Teenagers---sheesh.

Disney is the best place to see families behaving badly. Rudeness is everywhere. Everyone seems to think that Disney is a good excuse to wear every tacky t shirt you own. Lots of ugly clothes---with people to match. I'm glad my family likes to look "cute" when on vacation. Even if their feet hurt.

We went to a Rolling Stones concert followed by a Beatles (not to be confused with the picture of the hugest beetle we've ever seen) concert one night. It really bothered me that the people singing along seemed soooo old---which makes me think we look that old too. What a downer. It was fun to see so many young people singing along. We might be getting old, but at least our music isn't!

Poor Victoria can sometimes get lost in the shuffle. She's always been at that in-between age and probably will be for about 5 more years---too young to run around with the teens. I was glad to see her get singled out by one of the crazy Disney characters. She got to be the center of attention for a few minutes.

Conversations overheard:

Jordan: "Morgan, I wouldn't like you if you only had one arm."

Elizabeth: "I don't think Jordan knows me. She hasn't looked at me or said my name."

I don't remember which one of the girls said this, but Mindy can attest that it's is true---"your car is like your purse." Mindy still hasn't emptied her car since her move 2 years ago.

Great trip, good to be home!

"We're NOT Cheaters, Just Stupid!"

I started playing in this major bridge tournament on Monday. You have to have a team of four. I think my fellow bridge buddies invite me because they are old ladies and they need me to drive. I used to think it was for my free parking. I also am the team captain which means I fetch stuff and haul everything (2 of the ladies stayed at the hotel, so that meant, I hauled their suitcases and the one's oxygen rolling cart), get them water, sign us up and pay the fees, get pencils and score sheets, record the scores---just basically keep us organized---which, of course, suits me just fine. I like being the boss.

All was going well until the second round of play---you play 12 hands per round. We had played the first 6 boards and now were changing opponents. While we waited for others to finish, the 4 of us were chatting. About that time, the director---very Nazi-ish with the accent to go with it---came over and yelled at us. Apparently, it looked like we were discussing the hands---which you can't do since we all play the same ones. We're not idiots, we know we can't discuss the hands and weren't doing that. The director then said, that we shouldn't even be together until after the round was over. He told us that if anyone contested the scores, we would be disqualified. I later told our opponents that we're not cheaters, just stupid! He was not a nice guy.

We won the first round fair and square. I got home at 11 p.m. I was so wound up that I couldn't sleep. The last time I looked at the clock it was 2 a.m. and I had to get up at 6.

We played round 2 at 9:30 Tuesday morning. It didn't start off well when my partner's cell phone rang---a HUGE no no in bridge. The Nazi came over and yelled at her. Actually I was sort of glad about that because you know how I feel about cell phones. Old ladies don't think rules apply to them.

I would say that the average age of the 500 or so bridge players would be somewhere around 70. The ladies I play with are in their mid-80's except for my partner who is about 77. My friend, Mary Jo, with the oxygen needed help changing out her tank. Luckily, I had all that oxygen tank maintenance experience from helping mom last year. But it was all for naught as I was in the bar when she needed my help! By the time they met up with me, they had already had a drink of their own---vodka, straight, on the rocks. They ended up having another drink in the bar. That's when I found out that their maiden names were Zimmermann!

We played a total of 96 boards on Tuesday, but ultimately lost. I got home again about 11 p.m.---exhausted since I only got 4 hours sleep the night before. I slept like a baby and even took a 2 hour nap this afternoon. That's a lot of bridge---maybe it's the brain power that exhausted me. All in all, we played pretty well. We would have done much better if we could have played in our own division. But, Joan, my partner (for the last 20 years) has over 1000 points (compared to my 98) which threw all of us into a higher bracket. Joan plays just about every day of the week. That's why she has so many points. You earn points in fractions, so it really takes a long time for them to add up.

At the tournament, I saw our director from Hillwood. I told him about our stupidity the first night. He laughed and said that we were seasoned enough bridge players that we should have figured that out. He's a nice guy and knows that we're not cheaters. He may be German (his last name is Birnbaum), but he's no Nazi!!

Up next---Disney report!

We're Home!

Wow! I have so much to report! And I promise to do that very soon. I spent 5 hours today, downloading, organizing, uploading, ordering and scanning (about 60) photos. Jeanne, you are going to have to think of something really nice to do if you want me to share those scans with you! It was a big job---and I still have more to do---just what's left on my walls.

Here are a few photos from our trip to tide you over. Guess whose room this is? It was such a mess that the maid didn't even come in one day!

Mitchell drew the short straw and had to stay with Butch and I---which really wasn't all that bad as he was the only one in the family with a bed to himself. This could have been our room except that he managed to keep his "crap" between his bed and the wall and behind the bathroom door. By the second to last night, we could barely open the door. When he gathered his stuff to take to his family for packing, there was a pile of sand left behind. It made me laugh!

All I can say about this room is---thank goodness it was so big! When I was taking these photos, Mindy was quick to point out that she had all her stuff in one place. That might be, but I've seen her apartment look like this too.

Now I've Heard it All!

It was reported on the news that a family here in the Nashville area has bats in their attic and walls. They are not allowed to do anything about them as the bats are on the endangered species list. The bats have multiplied so fast that the family has been forced to move out. Finally, some other "authority" determined that this particular bat is just a regular "brown" bat and not endangered after all. Now the family can have them exterminated and move back into their house. Even if the bat was endangered, what about the children the bats were endangering---what about rabies? Since when are animals more important than people? This is going too far---who the heck cares if the dang bat is endangered? I guarantee you---if bats move in to my house---they WILL be endangered! I'll sic Butch and his BB gun on them! I'm just sayin'.

PS Besides the squirrel problem, the rabbits are eating everything in sight. I had purple petunias all around the pool. They are all just about gone---not to mention my tomatoes, green peppers and other veggies. I told Butch I wanted him to "get after" them too. He laughed and said it wouldn't do any good. I couldn't believe he said that---Mr. I can't sit still for 2 minutes without having to jump up, grab my gun and go after the squirrels. I asked him if he was admitting that his harassing of the squirrels wasn't doing any good either. He smiled and said, "okay, I'll start on the rabbits." They are going to be some sorry bunnies!

A Year of Memories---July

We're heading off to Disney tomorrow for our family vacation. I'm hoping to blog from there depending on internet access. I don't mind paying if it's a reasonable rate as I consider it part of the cost of vacation. I'm addicted to my computer and can't travel without it! If you don't hear from me, then that just means that it was ridiculously expensive and even I wouldn't pay!!

But, before I go, I wanted to share the latest layouts from AYM. The topic this month was your daily or weekly routine. I did two layouts because I wanted to do both. The first one here is titled "Weekly Life". I scanned my calendar and then printed it out. I also enlarged it, printed it on vellum and mounted it on the chipboard letters that I had already pained blue. Butch gets credit for going over to Christ the King to get a photo of the church for me. He's so sweet!

"Details of Everyday Life" is just about my day to day---starting with a picture of the microwave indicating what time I got up on that particular day. Then it's a matter of detailing my daily routine.

Jeanne and I had the same idea about the clock theme, but I must admit, her layout is a little more creative with the clocks than mine. Her title is "My Daily Grind"---she used the bullet point style of journaling to give an account of her movements through the day. One thing we all learned is that she's really a slacker at work! Lucky girl. Oh, and she takes a lot of medicine!

Pam's layout is titled, "My Everyday Life". She used a list style journaling and included highlights of her month. The circles on the left were cut all in one piece from the Cricut cartridge---calendar---I'm not sure of the name.

Stephanie's title is "It all starts with the Kitchen Sink". Her layout is about how much time she spends cleaning the kitchen due to the girls being home with friends. They might clean some, but not to her satisfaction---plus they eat all day long---cooking and making messes even into the night.

Karolyn's title "Agenda for a week" tells the story of the past week for her which included an impromptu trip to Birmingham to help her daugther, Erin with the baby. All of our lives are hectic, so she decided to focus on just one week of hers.

Susan went with "Life...Everyday". She created a great layout about what happens everyday. She said that after she had it completed, she had an "aha moment" at 5 a.m. She created a layout that was actually a lie! The layout is about how she wishes her life was---but rather, it's much more chaotic than the layout shows. She used today as an example---she barely gets downstairs---still in her "jammies" when her husband comes in and growls that he needs some towels. Turns out, their daughter, 30 something, Sarah who has moved home for a couple months, left her sunroof open. The sprinkler had soaked the inside of her car. Susan was outside in her pajamas trying to help dry it out. Then a little later, said daughter was on a business call when the home phone rang. She threw the phone to Susan about 10 yards down the hall. Susan feels a little out of control---which is justified due to the fact that she is also in the middle of re-modeling her kitchen.

There's never a dull moment for any of us. That's the point of this page---to just capture a glimpse of what our life is like in 2010!

Next month's theme is "ancestors". Can't wait to see what everyone comes up with.