Thursday, October 22, 2015

You Just Can't Make This Stuff Up!!

So, here's the story:

On Wednesday, I was going to the theater with my friends. We have season tickets---for over 25 years now. We meet at Connie's and I usually drive since I have the only car that holds 6 people. Since my surgery was on my left foot this time, I've been given the okay to drive. Still, knowing that I needed to get out of the car near doorways, I had Karolyn get behind the wheel.

We had an extra ticket, so Mindy met us at J. Alexander's for dinner. We all piled in my car for the short drive to the theater.

Fast forward to intermission----110 minutes in to the play! It was so terrible, that we decided to leave.  We all agreed that this was the worst play we'd ever seen there---Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead. We never did figure out which guy was which---they even were confused about it---which I guess was supposed to be funny. It's some sort of weird take-off of Hamlet. Anyway, we hated it, we left.

Mindy went out the side door with me while my friends went to retrieve the car. As we were walking down the steps---yep---you can see this coming---I FELL! Not really a full fall down a flight of stairs type fall---more of a little roll because I didn't realize there was one little 2 inch step at the end. Of course it hurt. I heard the crack. I laid there a bit to absorb the pain. Mindy was panicking, but I knew I was okay. I just needed to collect myself. There were a couple of smokers out there who rushed over. You know the embarrassment of that---"Oh, mam, are you okay?"---as you're laying there feeling all foolish and less than graceful. My thought---"thanks for asking, but please blow your smoke in the other direction."

More thoughts:
"Oh my gosh, I can't believe I'm laying on this disgusting pavement!"
"I hope I'm up before my friends pull around."
"How many people have seen me sprawled out on the pavement."
"I can't believe I'm laying on this disgusting pavement!"
"I can't believe I'm laying on this disgusting pavement!"
"I can't believe I'm laying on this disgusting pavement!"

What I actually said:
"Mindy, brush me off!"
"Mindy, did you brush me off?" I even fluffed my hair.

Two really nice guys helped me up. One went inside and got a wheel chair. Just about the time they wheeled me to the curb, my friends pulled up. They thought I was playing a joke on them. I'm such a faller---always have been. It didn't take them long to realize that I was really hurt.

We made a plan. This is what I wanted to happen: "Just drop me off at the emergency room and then I can "Uber" it home." I was unable to get ahold of Butch. Mindy offered to come with me---I refused. Emergency rooms can take hours. I didn't need anyone wasting their time. Still, Connie insisted on going with me. Karolyn dropped us off at the ER and took the other girls home.

Connie got a wheelchair and wheeled me in. There appeared to be only one person ahead of me, so I was seen within 15 minutes. Karolyn returned and Butch arrived. It was party in the ER!

I had Connie take the pictures---everything is a photo op:

She's not so experienced with cell phone pictures. She kept "holding down" the button, so it didn't look like it was taking. When I got home there were about 30!!

Everyone was very nice. I was in and out in about an hour and a half. The diagnosis: fractured ankle and baby toe! What are the odds! They put me in another boot---didn't have the style I already had. I was sent home with two prescriptions and instructions to see my orthopedic doctor. I had no intention of refilling the prescriptions. After all, I do have my personal stash of oxycodone---should it become necessary. It didn't. Ibuprofen is taking care of it.
I took this one once I got settled on the couch. After about an hour, I switched the boots. The gray one is much more comfortable. I'm going to ask for a matching one when I see my doctor on Friday.

Actually, this type of injury is not new to me. As I said, I've always been a faller. 21 years ago, I had almost this exact same injury. I was just walking across the driveway and "rolled" my foot on a piece of mulch. Yes, a chunk of mulch. I couldn't walk on it for a couple days, but didn't seek medical help because after all, it was a chunk of mulch!! Two weeks went by and my foot wasn't totally healed.

The reason I finally went to the doctor was purely for vanity's sake. Sandy's wedding was just two weeks away and I had the most awesome shoes that I could not wear. Dr. Greg Mencio is head of Orthopedics at Vanderbilt and a personal friend. He is actually a pediatric orthopedics doctor. I looked a little funny sitting in his waiting room with all of those kids. But, hey, you call in favors when you need them!!

Same sort of injury. I had fractured a bone in my foot (same foot too). He put me in a boot. I asked about the shoes and the wedding. He said: "You'll decide how quickly you heal by how much you are willing to stay off of it." By golly, I got in those shoes!!

This feels exactly the same way. You know how I feel about multi-tasking---why not recuperate from two foot issues rather than just one!! It's a win-win! I'd already planned the time off. Now, I don't have to feel guilty about laying around and stitching for hours at a time.

Works for me. Really, all you can do is laugh!! It seems like such a ludicrous situation! You just can't make this stuff up!!


  1. Sheesh Barbara! Your line "I laid there awhile to absorb the pain" - EXACTLY how I felt last Friday when I fell! And mortified when my neighbor ran over to check on me. You must have an extremely high pain tolerance!

  2. Oh dear , you poor thing. I fell a few weeks ago and did my wrist in, I know what you mean about feeling embarrassed!

  3. You poor thing! No, you couldn't make it up. When I broke that bone in my foot last year I didn't know I'd done it until it started to swell..probably was a good thing you went and got checked out sooner rather than later. Keep on healing (have I said that before?!)

  4. Oh I am sending you special healing cwtches (hugs with a welsh accent) They are guaranteed to make you smile and they never run out. Everytime you feel in need of a comforting hug you'll here a soft welsh voice say "there, there Cariad, I'll cwtch you better" and the smile will ease the pain

  5. Oh golly, sending you a very careful cyber-hug. I hope you are determined to heal quickly again, and stay off that foot - make that feet.

  6. I'm so glad you're able to laugh about it . . . because that's often the best medicine!! My Mama has always been a "faller" too, but she's never broken or fractured anything. It's amazing to me, but not uncommon to see her with bruises here or there after another tumble. Sending prayers for quick healing for BOTH feet!! :)

  7. Oh ouch! So sorry to hear you fell. I roll my ankle too so empathise - hope it is healing quickly and I'm thankful you have another more comfortable boot.

  8. It's best you did see a doctor. I was in so much pain when I fell after twisting my ankle and it turned out that I did have a fracture. I had turned my foot so badly I felt my ankle bone hit the ground. I got treatment that included much needed pain relief and I had physical therapy afterwards.

    Agnes Lawson @ Pain Relief Experts


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