Last year, all holiday season long, I made fun of that stupid "snuggie" they advertised on tv. Basically, it's a cover with arms. The commercial always shows a woman looking all warm and comfortable in her "snuggie" reading a book. The thing looks ridiculous.
You can imagine my surprise when I opened one for Christmas. My first thought was, "oh my gosh---who would think I wanted this. Did I not make myself clear with my ridicule?" Then I started to laugh as it HAD to be a joke. About that time, Butch piped up that he thought it would be good for the Titan's games. "Okay," I thought, "that's not a bad idea."
Fast forward to the Titan's game today. Temperature about 35 degrees. I put on all of my old ski clothes that would fit---long johns, 2 pairs of pants, another t-shirt, sweatshirt, turtle (just a neck thing you can pull up over your nose), headband, coat with hood, glove liners and KOMBI mittens (expensive ski mittens---that really keep your hands toasty)---all to be topped off with my snuggie.
We got down to the stadium about 9:15 for tailgating. We're usually there by 8:30 to get our "spot." (Well, I should say our "new spot"---some other people stole our last one---which I am still bitter about. Seems that they "horned in" while Butch and I were in St. Louis dealing with "mom" issues. I certainly would have confronted them. No one in our group did, so by the time Butch and I got to our first game, they were firmly established. Our group is pushed down to a little grove of trees next to the band. I was pretty unhappy at first, but now I guess it's not that bad. Connie reminded me that when it's really hot, it will be nice to have the shade. Okay, fine. I said that next year I'm going at 6 a.m. and steal our old spot back---just to make those "new" people have to fight for it). Today we didn't think we needed to be in a rush to get there due to the cold and we were right. I was all snuggly warm with my "snuggie." Butch made me hot chocolate and put it in a thermos. He really takes care of me when we go to the Titan's games. I think it's because he's so happy that I'm willing to go. I only go for the tailgating---the game is pretty boring to me---and unbearably long.
Anyway, back to my story. Eating anything with mittens on is a problem. The Broussard's did the food this time and pulled out some Boy Scout popcorn that their grandson was selling. I didn't know the Boy Scouts sold popcorn. I guess cookies were "taken." I asked Butch to come over to "feed me" some popcorn. Before he could get over to me, Jack put a handful under my mouth. I was able to stick it to my tongue to eat. I guess that's about the first time Jack had a woman eating out of his hand!!
Next came lunch. Butch made my plate. I had to take one mitten off to eat because he didn't want to feed me. I whined a little, but went ahead and ate in my glove liner. That hand got pretty cold.
About 11:30, we packed everything up to head into the stadium. The only problem was that when I got up, I had a major wedgie. Have you ever tried to get a wedgie out with mittens on? Impossible! Connie offered to do it---which really made me laugh---"sure, Connie, remove my wedgie." She said "that's what friends are for." I don't think so! Jack, overhearing us, but not knowing what I needed help with, volunteered to come to my aid. Connie and I looked at each other and laughed. NO WAY would I let Jack do that. I just wiggled around and got the wedgie dislodged.
I also was unable to adjust my headband that was slipping off of my ears. I asked Butch to fix it for me, but he kept pulling my hair as he tugged on the band. I told him that he needed to take his gloves off to do it right. He did, but still managed to pull my hair---waaahhh. I love being a baby sometimes. He said maybe it's not worth it to take me to the games.
As we were loading up the car, I grabbed the blanket we had also brought. Butch said, "pick one or the other---we don't need both the snuggie and the blanket." I picked the snuggie. He then said, "no, take the blanket, the snuggie makes you look like a "doofus."
I rest my case. I have to admit, it is warm---and we saw several others at the game. Next time, I'm taking it in.
I think you should write a column in a newspaper or magazine. This one was priceless. With everything you had on I don't know how you could move. Just a day in the life of the "Eads"
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